The End of a Chapter: Graduation!

A picture is worth a thousand words...so the saying goes. Which is good because my words are shaky and tear filled tonight.

Happy Graduation Day to my beautiful,  smart, talented, charismatic,  daughter!

Congratulations,  Grace! I love you!

The End of a Chapter: Last Day of School

I cannot believe this day has come and gone.  It seems like just yesterday I was in the same chapel attending her preschool graduation.  Yet,  the final day of Grace's grade school career has passed.

I was scheduled to leave work early to attend the final award ceremony and celebration for the 8th grade class of 2014. That morning,  my mom called with news that Grace had fallen off a desk. Apparently,  she was taking stuff down off the walls and the desk she was standing on tipped over. She face planted to the ground.

With the fall,  she bit through her lip.  I talked to her on the phone and she was confident she was fine....just a little banged up. Her arm was hurting from the landing. She was going to ice it and I'd check it out at the awards ceremony.

I called the pediatrician and made an appointment for after school.... just incase.

At the ceremony,  her arm was in a make shift sling with ice wrapped around it. It was swelling some so I decided to keep the appointment. 

She received several awards including 4 years of honor roll. I was, and still am, extremely proud of her. I teared up when they cut her ribbon from the class pole. I still can't believe how much she has grown.

After the ceremony the 8th grade went through a farewell receiving line and congregated on the soccer field for one last class picture. All but 2 of her classmates have been together since kindergarten; the other two since third grade. I'm so proud of her entire class and it's been an honor to watch them grow and succeed together.

The final results from the doctor visit concluded with a broken arm. Grace has always made an impression and certainly created a memorable event by braking a bone on the last day of school.  Leave it to Grace to go out with a bang!

Moved by the Spirit

Grace Elizabeth Philomena Rodriguez had been confirmed!  Praise the Lord!  She's filled with the Holy Spirit!

Confirmation was held at the St. Louis Cathedral Basillica. It's the most beautiful Church I've ever been in. I was confirmed there along with all my sisters and brothers.  It had been awhile since I'd been back and was once again amazed by the beauty and reverence.

My sister Laura stood as Grace's sponsor.  She came over early afternoon to get ready with us.  Grace and I had found a beautiful dress that didn't break the bank. I got to wear something from my closet.  I miss the days when I used to be able to by myself new clothes for special occasions.  But I guess this day wasn't about me anyway.

I broke out my hair dresser skills and did a simple but elegant up do for Grace. She looked gorgeous!

We got to the Cathedral a little early because I hate crowds and wanted to get some good pictures without the nuisance of other people.  Grace and Laura really got into the photo shoot. 

To keep holy the sacrament,  I'm only posting the appropriate ones. 

To my daughter Grace on her Confirmation day....

The End of a Chapter: 8th Grade Mass and Field Day

Yesterday was the final 8th Grade Mass.  To celebrate, the parents were invited to attend with a breakfast and classroom game to follow.  I made arrangements at work to come in late and met Grace in the chapel.  She was full of energy and her exuberance just poured out.  The Mass was nice but I couldn't help but think back to her first years at Holy Trinity.

Always a bubbly child that talked a little too much, she has grown into the queen of the school.  Not that I ever had any doubt that this was her future there.  I am constantly in awe of what a wonderful young woman she is becoming.  I keep going back to past and realizing just how much we grew up together.

Going through old pictures last week really hit home that point.  I sometimes get sad to think of all the memories I've had that have been tainted in someway because of the nature of my failed marriage.  But recently, I have begun to see that these memories were never really mine and his.  They were always mine and Grace's.  She has always been the constant in my adult life.  Although I grew up faster than most, I look now at my beautiful teenage daugher and am overwhelmed with the love I not only have for her but the love that she has for the world. 

Grace is an amazing person.  I know she is more and more everyday becoming who God designed her to be, but I can't help but wonder at how I also had a hand in that.  Through the adversity and hard times, she has blossomed into a beautiful soul.  To know Grace is to love Grace.  From the outside looking in, you would never imagine the struggles she has overcome.  My heart is bursting with love for her; her accomplishments, her spirit, and her zest for life. 

Her sense of competitiveness really came through yesterday during the "current events" game.  Losing was not an option and she really inspired and encouraged her team.  Of course, I didn't want to lose either which made the game even that much more fun.  Good thing we were on the same team.  After an intense 10 rounds and 2 tie-breaking bonus rounds, our team won!  Not only did we win, but we won and broke the highest score record set by an 8th grade class several years ago.  Go big or go home....so the saying goes.

Today, is the 8th Grade's last Friday at Holy Trinity.  Ever.  I still cannot beleive where the time has gone and I can't stop tearing up.  Field Day has been schedule for the afternoon.

When Grace was in Kindergarten, she decided that her 8th Grade Field Day team was going to be the Wild Cats (from High School Musical).  She's been planning this day for 9 years!

Of course, I always find my creativity in the 11th hour.  So yesterday we were at Wal Mart at 7pm picking out supplies to make her T-Shirt.  I also needed to make one for Alex because we just didn't have a polk-a-dot shirt.

By 9pm, I got the chance to start working on the shirts.  I actually really love doing this stuff, it's finding the time that's the problem.  I painted and glittered and poured little bits of my love into this project.  I'm pretty happy with the final results.  But more importantly, they are too!

Navy Warhawks

Polk-a-Dot Popsicles

Striped Wild Cats

Communion of Faith

On Saturday evening,  my little Eva Bean made her first communion.  The weekend was pretty jammed packed. I was starting to feel pretty guilty for not having much prepared or planned for this important occasion.  I guess that's what happens to the third child,  but I wanted to make it special for her anyway.  She's a very special girl and had stolen my heart in more ways than one.  Grace and Alex often refer to her as my favorite.  I love all my children equally, but Eva is just so easy to get a long with.  I really miss the days when it was just me and her all day.  We had a great routine and try to simulate it again whenever we can.  She doesn't ask for much and is compliant with my requests 99% of the time.  I'm sure her easy going personality added to the guilt of not having a special day planned for her.

The cast party for Grace's play was Friday night after the performance.  I didn't get home until after midnight,  but still slept terribly because of the the stuff running through my mind for Saturday.  I planned to get up around 8 am to get started on my list,  but was awake by 6:30 am.

I went ahead and got up to get a head start on the day.  I washed dishes and cleaned the house.... something I had neglected all week.  I baked brownies,  went to the grocery store and hot glued Eva's first communion banner to hang at Church. I started laundry and put rollers in Eva's hair. By this time,  Alex was lost in Minecraft and Layla was content hanging out with Grace.  I took this opportunity to spend time with just Eva.  I did her nails and make up. Then we cuddled up for a little nap. 

We got to Mass early and was really happy I got some great pictures without the insane crowd.

The Mass was nice albeit a little unorganized.  I stood with Eva as she received her first Eucharist. She looked beautiful!  I am so proud of her.  Our journey as a family has not always been easy,  but it had always been faith filled. It's our faith that got us through the rough times,  and I'm so happy she is growing in her faith.   Her relationship with Jesus will continue to strengthen through this communion.

Here are some of my favorite pictures of Eva's special day.

The End Of A Chapter: 8th Grade Play

Last Friday was Grace's 8th grade play. All week long I was an emotional wreck! Any mention of the play would bring tears to my eyes.  My sister sent me picutes from the dress rehearsal on Thursday morning and I literally sat at my desk and cried. 

Grace is my baby. I'm mean really she's not the baby but the oldest.  But she's my baby.   I was barely 21 when I had her. We've been through so much together.  So many things she'll never remember.... most for the better.  She won't remember the times we ran in the night to my parents house to escape a bad situation.  She won't remember the times I'd go back to that same situation because I was afraid to be alone.  She won't understand how much strength I've gained from her throughout the years. She may not know that when I made the decision to leave for good,  it was by her blessing.  Her words,  "mom we deserve better" gave me what I needed to start our life over.  We have grown up together.  And what an amazing young woman she had become!

The 8th grade play is the first event  of many that reminds me this chapter of her life... our life... is coming to an end.  As excited as I am to begin the new journey with her,  it's still bittersweet.

But,  back to her play!

I was fearful that I'd be a mess through the whole performance.  However,  the play, The Big Bad Musical,  was hilarious!  Of course she did a fantastic job.  I know she overcame a lot of fears and self doubt to pull off the performance.  I am so proud of her! 

In true Grace form,  she was worried that no one would be there to watch her play.  Little did she know,  I had sent out several Facebook invites.  Over 20 of our friends and family were in the audience.  She was overwhelmed by the love and support.  She received four beautiful bouquets of flowers. It was a pretty awesome moment to be her mom.  Above all, she was proud of herself! I can't even come up with the words to describe my love for her.

One of Those Days

My day started yesterday with a scheduled settelment conference for my divorce.  When the other lawyer doesn't show up, though, it's hard to get anything accomplished.  However, the judge did order that the ex cannot drive the kids anywhere due to his revoked license.  Of course if you have a revoked license, not driving should be obvious. But that's not the kind of person I'm dealing with.

Although I'm glad he has to abide by the law while my kids are with him, this new restriction places more of a burden on me.  Since he can't take them to school, they came home last night instead of staying with him.  It worked out well because Grace had dress rehearsal this morning and wanted my assistance with her hair and make up.  The down side to this arrangement was having to leave my mom to finish the stage for the play so I could be home when they got there last night.  Also, Alex hadn't done his homework and left both his phone and school uniform at his dads.  When I called his dad to see if I could get his stuff, he blamed his driving situation on me and proceeded to call me some pretty awful names before hanging up on me.  No one can get me worked up like him.  I was fuming.  But more than anything, I was stressed out.  I was trying to run lines with Grace, help Alex with his homework, get the girls ready for bed and get a shower myself.  It was already 10 pm and the end was no where in sight.

I took a few minutes and sent a message to the closest ladies in my life.  I often forget how amazing it is to have such a good support network.

After some much needed encouragement from them and a good cry, I finished what needed to be done, put off what I could and got some sleep.  I've been having strange dreams lately, but can never remember them the next morning.  Last night, I woke up to what sounded like my dad yelling my name.  I was kind of panicky because I could have sworn I locked the front door.  I laid in bed for a minute and realized I must have been dreaming.  I tried to listen to see if I heard anymore, but there was nothing.

The more I think about it today, the more I wonder if it wasn't really God calling me in a familiar voice.  I know I've been carrying a lot the last few weeks, and there was something calming about hearing that voice call my name.

Although I'll probably never know what has been going on in my subconscious, I do know that I have to put my life in God's hands. God always provides.