In Full Consumption by Summer

Well, it is officially safe to say that this summer has consumed me.  For the last six weeks, we had a lot of fun hanging out with family, hosting birthday parties, taking a little vacation and just soaking up the summer.  So much fun has been had!

I've had some ups and downs this summer emotionally.  For some reason, my lows have been really, really low.  But my highs have only been a little high.  It's not that I'm constantly in a bad place, but that when I get to a bad place I have a hard time pulling myself from it.  I know a lot has to do with sharing custody of the kids.  I feel like I can't make a plan past just a few days because of their time with their dad.  They also don't want to spend time with him which makes forcing them to go even harder.  And regardless of the amount of time we get together, or lack there of, there is always so much that needs to be done that it doesn't really feel like quality time.  Then throw in the friends they want to have over or go to their houses, their moods, and their intense desire to make their own plans, I often feel like I'm completely overwhelmed with the decisions to make decisions.

My parents 40th anniversary is also coming up in a few weeks.  We've been working to coordinate a dinner and play to celebrate.  Of course, the week prior to the big day is when Chris has decided to take the kids on vacation.  The whole idea of my kids going out of state with him is nerve wrecking enough, but now he's sneakily made his "week" into 10 days completely ignoring the fact that the kids need to be home by 6pm on August 7th.  It will be a miracle if they are back in time for the anniversary party which has literally brought me to tears several times today.

Grace turned 15 on Sunday and requested to get her permit on Monday.  I sent her the Driver's Ed book six months ago and scheduled the afternoon off not long after that.  I reminded her often that she needed to study and even went so far as to offer to reschedule my day off for another couple weeks down the road if she didn't feel like she was prepared.  She insured me she was ready.  So, I took the day.

And she failed.  Twice.  I know I should be supportive and encouraging and try to build her confidence back up because she was upset that she didn't pass.  But I'm not.  I'm pissed.  She put very little effort into learning the material.  She took some online practice tests but never once read the book.  I put more effort into getting her to the testing site than she did on learning the information.  I flipped out on her a bit yesterday, but I'm seriously still really mad that the day was ruined because she didn't hold up her end.  TO PASS THE FREAKING TEST!!!

I know she's not a great test taker, but COME ON! She didn't even open the book!

So, yeah, this week has been pretty crummy.

But, we really have had some great times this summer.  We made a lot of great memories on our little trip.

Today, I just needed to vent!

Fifteen

She's the air that I breathe.  

She's the beat in my heart.  

She's the tear in my eyes when we're apart.  

She's the pride that I feel, with all she achieves.  

I'm the one that gives hope, in what she believes.  

She's a part of my body, but now she's all grown.  

As she waves me goodbye to find a life of her own.  

My beautiful girl, you've grown up so fine.  

You make me so proud to know that you're mine.

-Toni Kane

The Great Get - A - Way

Because we bought a house this year, we knew that a vacation this summer was no longer an option.  The first and last vacation was in 2013 when we spent a full week on the shores of the Gulf.  It was incredible and relaxing and really  just perfect.  In 2014, we bypassed the vacation option because Grace was getting ready to start her freshman year at Incarnate Word Academy.  Not only was our summer driven by the plethora of activities and preparation for high school, our vacation budget was scrapped to cover the expenses of private school tuition, books, uniforms and activity fees.  We were still on a somewhat of a high from the last beach trip and running off the energy of starting a new chapter in a new school community.

This year, though, I really needed to go somewhere.  I mean, I am so happy that we bought a house and really happy with the house we bought.  For the first few months, every day seemed like vacation.  Coming home to a new place that was as cozy as much as it was a blank slate.  But, by the beginning of June I started to get an itch to get out and explore.  A co-worker mentioned a day trip to the Garden of the Gods. And that’s where the planning started.

I broke out my trusty apps of Trip Advisor and MapQuest and some Google searches and devised a plan.  At first, it really was just a day trip.  But then I crunched the numbers and decided that a night away was doable.  But then I found this cabin that stole my heart and took us into the southern part of Indiana, a new state visit for us.  But it was a minimum of a 2 night stay.  So, I crunched the numbers again, requested a day off work, and finalized our plan.

We left at four on Friday morning.  The kids happily went back to sleep for the drive into Southern Illinois.  I turned on some gospel music and watched the sunrise as I drove the quiet highway.  The kids woke up when we exited the main highway in exchange for some southern roads.  The windows rolled down and the music turned up and it was this moment that we all felt like we were on vacation.

Our first stop was at the Garden of the Gods, the place that put this whole trip into action.  As we drove the winding roads into the recreation area, we dodged not one but three deer.  I may have screamed a little as I navigated the car around these joyful animals while going probably just a little too fast.  The screams turned into laughter and easily became a memorable moment.  

Once arriving at the observation trail, we enjoyed some breakfast sandwiches and yogurt before beginning our first family hike. 

Now, as a side note, I did a lot of research for this trip.  I looked at hundreds of pictures of the Garden of the Gods, so I knew what to expect as we started this hike.  Almost immediately into the hike, were a few huge boulders that could be climbed.  Alex did not hesitate and scaled to the top quickly.  I was close behind him because why not?!?  My adrenaline was pumping and what was a little rock climbing.  The girls, though, were a little more timid.  After a little coercing, each of them made it to the top of the first boulder too.  And no matter how many pictures I had looked at previously, it was no way comparable to the beauty and majesty of being there.  The views were spectacular and really set the tone for our trip.

After the Garden of the Gods, we made our way through some more winding roads to Cave in Rock.  Now, this is the place that Alex was the most excited about.  We were going to see a real life cave where real life pirates hid out to seize the ships and barges that made their way down the Ohio river to get their goods to market.  And, we have never been in a cave so this was going to be pretty awesome.

We pulled into the playground area of the state park, took the long stair case up and found the placard depicting the history of Cave in Rock.  Then we took the stairs down to the river.  But just where was the cave?!?  I would have thought for certain it would be in this little nestled area.  It looked very similar to the pictures I had looked at online.  Mystified, we got back in the car and drove around the state park.  We parked again in another area and began to search again.  Finally, a maintenance man, probably after sensing our “where the heck are we” look, stopped and asked if he could help.  I asked him where we’d find the cave and he pointed us in the right direction…exactly where we had begun.  How was it possible that we were in the right place but couldn’t find the cave?  It’s a cave, after all.  It’s got to be pretty big! Well, the very helpful maintenance man answered that question for us too.  The entrance to the cave was flooded!  We couldn’t see the cave because the walk way to the actual cave was under water.  Seriously, if you didn’t know that was where the entrance was supposed to be you’d never even known there was a cave!

Alex was extremely disappointed.  He attempted to scale the rocks to see if he could make it over to the cave entrance.  He didn’t get too far.  Grace, in an attempt to avoid the wrath of a disappointed Alex, tried to wade the waters to get to the cave.  A few steps in, though, and it was evident that we’d all have to go under water to get there.  It was a sad reality.  But sometimes things just don’t work out.

We piled back in the car and got in line for the ferry.  We would be riding across the Ohio river into Kentucky.  Apparently, though, we weren’t the only ones that were riding that day.  As the ferry unloaded, literally 100 bikers got off.  It was quite a sight!  We got out of the car and let the wind lift our spirits on the open waters.  As we docked in Kentucky (only a 10 minute trip across the river), we noticed the next set of bikers waiting to load up.  The line of bikers must have gone on for at least a mile.  If this would have been Sons of Anarchy, I might have been a little nervous.  But everyone was so friendly!  It was a totally unexpected but cool experience to be in middle of a motorcycle club.

For the next hour and a half, we cruised the back roads of Kentucky through wheat fields and farmland.  We danced and sang to the playlist Grace had created.  We rocked out hard to “Little Einsteins.”  Then we made it to the park in Kentucky for lunch.

It was HOT!  So, incredibly hot by that afternoon.  We found a picnic table in the shade and scarfed down our picnic lunch.  The plan was to explore and hike at the park.  After spending 30 minutes outside to eat lunch, we could take the heat no more!  There was a museum at the park that we sought refuge in, mainly because Layla had to go to the bathroom.  It was so nice and air conditioned in there, we didn’t want to leave.  Although we did not actually pay the money to go through the museum exhibit, we did enjoy about 20 minutes of hanging out in the lobby.

From there we headed off to Indiana.  Since we were a little too early to check in at the cabin in New Harmony, we made a pit stop at Turino’s Pizza and Brewery in Evansville.  Originally I had planned to eat dinner there on Saturday night, but thought we’d check it out since we were driving right by it.  I thought we’d get some ice cream and then move on.  Unfortunately the menu was primarily pizza and no ice cream options.  The kids got a soda each and I tried a local craft beer.  We perused the menu and noted that this was not where we wanted to eat dinner.  So, even though it was an unplanned stop, it served it’s purpose as we were able to rule it out for our dinner on Saturday.

Check in was quick and easy at the cabin!  We literally had a cabin in the woods, secluded from most of the rest of the area.  Upon walking in, I was happily surprised how nice it was.  I mean it’s a cabin so I was expecting a step up from a tent but a pretty rustic residence.  Not the case!  This place was beautiful.  It was an A-Frame house with vaulted ceilings, two bedrooms, a kitchen overlooking the living room and a screened in back porch.  It was perfect!

We hosted a taco night and took a small hike through the property.  Grace accidentally locked as all out by shutting the door with the keys and my phone inside.  Luckily, she had her phone in her hand so I was able to call the main office.  Within 10 minutes, the maintenance man let us in and showed me how to keep the door from locking automatically.  Since I had his full attention, I also had him check the fridge that didn’t seem to be running.  He would be returning with some help the next morning to replace it.  He turned the thermostat up on the fridge a little bit and miraculously it started working over night.  Maintenance men were very helpful to me on this trip!

That evening, I started a fire and we roasted marshmallows.  I managed to leave home without grabbing the chocolate bars out of the freezer.  And S’Mores just aren’t the same without chocolate.  So, I improvised.  We picked out a handful of M&M’s out of the trail mix and topped our marshmallows with them.  Not as good as a Hershey bar, but it would do.

Later that night, I hooked up the projector, popped some popcorn and we relaxed while watching “A League of Their Own.”

The next morning, I made the ultimate county breakfast complete with eggs, bacon, sausage, toast, biscuits and gravy and an assortment of fruit.  We washed it all down with some coffee and juice.  And there were several moments in my breakfast eating experience that I had to pause and take deep breaths.  I was so, so full.  But it’s vacation and the food was delicious so therefore I must EAT.IT.All!

Once breakfast was cleaned up, we laced up our Nike’s to go burn some of those calories with a 3 mile hike.  Immediately, Grace declined the hike.  Alex, Eva and Layla were gung ho, though.  But, we didn’t make it to the top of the cabin area before Layla decided she didn’t really want to walk after all.  I ran her back to the cabin to hang out with Grace, and Alex and Eva and I finally started the hike.  It got hot in parts, but we really enjoyed the scenic views.  And I really need to work off that breakfast.

When we returned, Grace and Layla were napping.  

We changed clothes and decided to bypass lunch since we were still stuffed from breakfast.  We drove up to the pool and enjoyed an afternoon cooling off while still getting some sun.   

Before heading back to the cabin to get cleaned up for our evening activities, we decided to splurge on some ice cream from the concession stand.  Hands down, best ice cream ever!  I even had to go back to concession stand to buy myself one because I couldn’t let the kids have all the enjoyment.

Back at the cabin, I grilled up some brats and mixed up some shells and cheese for dinner.  Then we showered and changed for our big night on the town!  We were headed to Bosse Field in Evansville, the filming location for “A League of Their Own.”  However, instead of watching the Peaches, we’d be cheering for the Evansville Otters. 

The game was hot (a theme for the weekend) but fun.  Grace caught a t-shirt fired out of an air gun by a ball girl.  We toured the stadium as it is the third oldest operating stadium in the US.  We had a snack and some drinks and celebrated the Otter’s victory.

By the time we returned to the cabin, we were all exhausted.  I stayed up just a little later than the kids so that I could enjoy a glass of wine in the quietness of the country.  It was really peaceful.

The next morning, we packed up, dressed up and headed to the Wabash River.  Earlier in the weekend, I scouted out a place to take pictures near the river.  I also needed a place to prop my phone so I could set the timer and get a family picture.  I found just the place.  Alex got fed up with the photo shoot pretty quick, but I got a handful of good pictures regardless.

From there, we went to the little Utopian town of New Harmony.  The town was…well…weird.  It was eerily quiet, but maybe that was because it was a Sunday.  We planned on attending Mass at Holy Angels Catholic Church.  I had found the mass times online and felt confident about it’s accuracy when the same info was listed in the welcome packet at the cabins.  To our surprise, the Church doors were locked.  A neighbor doing yard work informed us that they no longer held services there but there were 2 other churches close by that had Sunday mass.  Unfortunately, those mass times had already passed.  We offered a few prayers, took some pictures outside the Church and then toured the town.

Since the town was so small, I decided it would be a great place for Grace’s first time driving.  She is definitely going to need a lot more practice.  But I think it was good for her to get the feel.  Plus, now she can say she first learned to drive in Indiana!

By noon, we were finished exploring.  We started the drive home and stopped off just outside of the main stretch into St. Louis for lunch at Applebee’s. 

Summing up the trip, we watched the sunrise as we traveled the back roads through Southern Illinois.  Took the ferry across the Ohio River.  Enjoyed a picnic lunch in Kentucky.  Spent a few nights in Indiana.  We hiked, swam, watched a baseball game, laughed, played and made a ton of memories!

Milestones and Memories

Five years ago, my entire family took over the waiting room at St. Louis Children’s Hospital.  For months, we had been praying reverently.  And that day, our prayers were answered.  God blessed Ruth with a new heart and a new life. 

She is our miracle.

Today, we celebrated Ruth.

And we remembered and honored the donor; an angel called home that gave Ruth the chance to live.  The magnitude of this blessing is not lost on us. 

May Ruth continue to grow in strength and love and may the family that gave her the gift of a new life find peace in God’s plan.