With a Single Step

Last night we met with Eva’s counselor for the first time.  She is a young, (Eva says 26, I say 35) pretty, blond.  She is very nice and seems sarcastic.  I think she will be a good fit for us.  I’m still not sure how my insurance will work to cover these sessions.  In the past, they have covered a set number after receiving documentation for the provider.  Right now we are planning for Eva to meet with Kathy once a week…unless it starts to cost me a fortune.

The first appointment was pretty basic.  We went through a general intake questionnaire.  Eva didn’t talk much, but the questions weren’t really ones she could answer.  I expressed what my concerns were and I tried to emphasize that I am open minded and will work with her however necessary to provide the best resources for Eva.

I even mentioned how I felt like there were things that were bothering Eva that she just couldn’t express, either out of mental acuity at the age of 8 or fear of hurting someone’s feelings.  I expressed that the anxiety seemed to heighten around the times she is going to or returning from her dad’s, but also understood that there could be things bothering her in regards to the way I run our household as well.

She will have her first one-on-one with Kathy next Monday.  I am very happy with this date as it is immediately following her weekend visit with her dad.  If there are things that are going on there that bother her, hopefully they will still be fresh in her mind when talking to her counselor.

I haven’t told Chris yet of the scheduled appointments.  He only knows that I was looking for a counselor for her to see.  His only contribution to the topic was that his child was not to be medicated.

I find that odd, considering in no way, shape or form was medication ever even thought about for her situation.  Sure, there are plenty of adults that take medication for anxiety, me being one of them.  But for a child, it’s not the first solution any therapist would jump to.  The purpose of therapy is to help the child develop positive coping mechanisms to lessen the anxiety.  Medication might be introduced for short term if the cognitive-behavoioral therapy didn't seem to be effective on its own....but that would be much further down the path than we are just beginning.

This is why I choose not to consult with him on most matters.  He has no clue what he is talking about but speaks as if he is an expert.  And he shows no empathy for his child.  He didn’t ask how he could help or if he could assist with costs or express any emotion or insight for what Eva might be going through.  His only response was a demand not to medicate “his” child.

But, I digress.  This isn’t about him.  At all.

I am looking forward to the opportunity Eva has to meet with someone she can share her feelings with.  I hope to uncover the primary source of her anxiety and learn how I can assist her in coping with those feelings.